I’m going to start right off by saying that I love my mom. She’s great! You’ll never find a nicer, sweeter or more giving person in your entire life. That being said; my mother is not very technical. No, that’s not right. She’s not technical at all. When she got a new washing machine we had to train her to use it. Not once but twice. Some idiot salesperson sold her a washing machine with fancy electronics. That clinched it. She was never going to figure out that washer.
It’s not just a washer but its cars, ovens, watches, and pretty much anything that smacks of technology.
Getting her on the computer is a lesson in futility. Allow me to give you an example using a recent phone call. Like today, recent.
Mom: Hi honey
Me: Hi mom. What’s up? (shaking my head because she seems to always call before a meeting)
Mom: I didn’t get the email with the Christmas lists for all of you.
Me: I sent it earlier today. (damn, damn, damn! I knew that I shouldn’t have sent it from my gmail account)
Mom: Well, I didn’t get it. I’ll check it again.
Mom: I still haven’t gotten it.
Me: Mom, I sent it from a different email address. Maybe it’s in your junk mail box.
Mom: I don’t have a junk mail box. (OMG, don’t I wish)
Me: Mom, your email account comes with a junk mail box.
Mom: Not mine. I don’t pay for that. (this is a lot like the conversation that I have with her about her cell phone. It seems that it doesn’t come with voice mail either.)
Me: Ok, I’ll resend it from our home email. Did you get it yet? (after I cut & paste the original email into a new email from the family account.)
Me: There’s like a circle button on the top left hand side of the page that says reload. Click on that.
Mom: Wow, how did you do that?
Me: It’s nothing, Mom (it’s frickin’ magic.)
Mom: What’s the blue underlined thing next to one of JR’s gifts?
Me: That’s a link that will take you to an example of what he wants. Go ahead and click on it.
Mom: OH! So that’s what he wants. Uh Oh, I should have never click there because now my email is gone.
Me: No its not, Mom. Just click on the X up on the top right. (please God spare me these conversations.)
Mom: I can’t do that. Every time I do the thing breaks.
Me: It won’t break. On the left is the back button. Click that.
Mom: Nothing happened.
Me: Is the back button highlighted.
Me: (rolling my eyes) OK, look at the bottom left corner. See the word start?
Me: What are the words to the right of the word start?
Mom: AOL mail and then Amazon.
Me: Click the red square with the X in it on the top right side of the screen. (this conversation has just gone beyond painful)
Mom: Do you really think that’s a good idea?
Me: Yes, mom. It’s okay. Honest, it is. Just click on it will you. (some days I’d like to reach through the phone to do it for her.)
Mom: Wow, you fixed it.
Me: Yeah, mom I fixed it. (pounding my head on my desk)
This is a typical computer conversation with my mother. You should just hear the ones about who died, has a deadly disease, or was thrown in jail. My life did get better after the local paper went regional. They stopped concentrating on people in our small town where she knows everyone.
And Mom, if you actually figure out how to open my blog from the link I gave you 9 months ago but you’ve never used, please know that I love you. You’re freaking hilarious though!
My son blogged about another computer incompetent. Unlike my mom (who really only needs to know how to open her email) this person should know something about computers. it's their job!
Have a great day everyone.