Goofy Poems

As I said in my post titled Yours till the same A.A. Milne book has a lot of goofy poems in it. I shared these with some friends that came over for dinner on Friday night, a little birthday celebration and a reason to drink cosmopolitans. It was decided that I needed to share these with the world (of course, I never thought otherwise. I share just about everything these days with you all. And I like it. JR and the youngest homeboy don't understand it but that's their problem.)

My MIL kept a lot of things from her years at the Colorado Woman's College including this book and an incredible overstuffed scrapbook. Over time I'll share this with you also if you'd like. As a piece of social history (librarian/archivist speak for cool old stuff that shows how people in the past lived) it is terrific. Only problem with this scrapbook is the shear volume of stuff glued into it. I'm having a hard time deciding how to organize this in a way that is meaningful and that honors her best. A while back I did post about the Western Union telegrams stuck into this book. It was a start. I'm thinking of doing a post about the invitations to tea. Who gets formal handwritten invitations to tea anymore. OK, who has ever been invited to tea formally?

Kath, since you have kids in high school I thought I'd pass these poems along so they have something to write in their classmates yearbooks this spring. I remember standing with a classmates yearbook in my hand without a thing to write. We'll spare your last 3 that agony. They will, of course, probably think these are sappy and stupid so I'll understand if they disdain from using any of them. These poems really are kind of sappy and stupid but it can't hurt to try.

Now, mind you these are not all of the poems. I won't bore you with some of them (as a librarian I can't abide censorship in any way. We'll call it collection management).

When you are married
And live in a tent,
I'll send you my washing
To help pay the rent.
Your classmate
Jess
Jess didn't seem to have any high hopes for my MIL's future.

Mary had a little watch,
She swallowed it one day,
& now she taking castor oil
to pass the time away.
Mary A.
Wow, castor oil. I can't even respond to this. That has got to be a first!

I had a little pig
And I fed him in a trough
He got so fat
His tail popped off
Your's till I learn to do Geometry (if ever)
Erma
"31"
Now, even I don't feed Tripper (my exceedingly over-weight Corgi, though we don't talk about it because he is very self conscience) so much that his stub of a tail will pop off. Ewwww...

May you ever be the same,
Never change except in name,
May your path be strewd with
roses,
And you husband "meek as
Moses".

Orpha Kaetz
Freshie.
( "meek as Moses" interesting concept. JR who is the one of the calmest, shyest, and easiest person alive (he really has to be. I'm his wife! His calmness to my frenzy brings balance to the Universe), could never be considered meek. Is there any such thing as a meek husband? And, would we really want them to be?)

I wish I were an elephant
And you a bail of hay
I'd tuck you in my rubber trunk
and carry you away
Or if I were a hammer
And you a little tack
I pound you very gently
With loving little whack
After our famous trip you don't dare contradict my word about Montana roads, eh?
Lovingly Lillian
(I took a trip to Montana last Spring. We drove around the mountains a bit. I'm not sure if the roads are any better now 70 odd years later).


Dear Margaret
Long may you live
Happy may you be
Sitting in a street car
Thinking of me.
Your friend,
Janet
Jan. 18, 1928
(I think this one is sweet though it will have to be modernized. Maybe switching street car to motor car. No that won't work. Maybe hybred car? Help me out here, please.)

Dear Marg
I had a little puppy dog
Skinny as a rail
Never grow no bigger
Didn't have a tail
Allus be a puppy
never be a hound
But you bet I'll never
Sell him at the butchers for-
20c a pound.
Yours till the statue of liberty
has twins
Margurite Snell "30"
(Am I wrong or is this just sad? In so many ways. "Allus" I think this is the word "always", the grammar is atrocious and how blood thirsty. Selling your dog at the butchers. Please!)

Love,
M