Merry Whatever and a Happy New Year

I usually don't do Holiday letters because, well, we are boring. That's what I said, boring. We don't live the exciting life I lead you all to believe. I know that makes me a big fat liar but it's my blog and if I want to spin out a fantasy or two I will. We pretty much come home, I cook, JR eats a mountain of Fritos, and the dogs mooch chucks of cheese off me. Day in and day out. That kind of boring.

But, this weeks Spin Cycle, sponsored by the lovely and talented (the girl can rock some poetry) Miss Jennifer, is Holiday letters so I thought I'd give it a try. It shouldn't be too painful. To visit others, who most likely have real action packed lives hence wonderful holiday letters go visit Jen.


Dear Friends and Family,

We’d like to take this opportunity to wish all of you a very merry Whatever it is you celebrate this year. Whether it is Hanukkah, Kwanza, Christmas or the solstice may it be filled with love, laughter, and chocolate. Because really who wants to celebrate a holiday without chocolate?

This year has seen plenty of changes in the Dogslife household (since we are such shallow people this shouldn’t take too long).

We moved. We moved from (dry brown dusty scorpion infested old people driving Buicks at 2 miles an hour) lovely Phoenix, AZ to (green humid bug infested crazy drivers that believe that turn signals are optional non-recycling environment haters) charming Houston, TX. It was one of the smoothest moves we have ever undertaken (I only suffered one major meltdown and a few minor ones that I made sure I communicated to JR in the best way possible while he was over a thousand miles away and couldn’t do anything about. Why? Because I’m giving like that.)

The Boys are doing great (since they no longer live at our house so they no longer sponge off us). They are living on their own and paying their own way. (Not as some would believe by breaking rocks on a chain gang). The Oldest is holding down a job and trying to convince his wife that paying for electricity is a luxury item. The Youngest is attending school and keeping (mooching off) my friend Lisa company. Thank you Lisa, you’re the best.

The dogs like the grass (as opposed to gravel) in the backyard and find all kinds of things in which to roll in. I don’t think a day goes by that they don’t come in the house smelling to high heaven and chewing on something that was breathing at one time. They are so cute and fluffy after their bath.

JR and I have grown closer over our mutual love for the dual sinks in our master bath, separate his and hers closets, the wine cooler in our kitchen and the wet bar in our living room. And can now start looking for houses that will deepen that love.

Health wise JR and I are doing well (for a couple of old people). If he can survive (not be knifed in the back) my menopausal mood swings, night sweats (put a pair of flannel pjs on if you’re so cold) and hot flashes (did you turn the heat on? WTF it’s sweltering in here) we should be able to make a go of this marriage.

We wish you many evenings dancing around that bonfire, Christmas tree, or menorah and a Happy New Year.

Love,
The Dogslife family