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Thursday, December 10, 2009

I think there has been a bit of a misunderstanding

I received this email today and was very flattered. But, I think I need to clear up a couple of things for Joy.

Hello Dear,

How are you today my name is mis joy, i am a yung lady i saw your profile today at dating site and i became interested in you,i will also like to know you more, I hope you will be sincere, and caring man, that I have been looking for, And I have something special to tell you about myself, So please reply me now so that I can also send my picture directly to you.
may God be with you
please I am waiting for your reply
yours sincerely joy,



My response (if I were to send one):


Dear Joy,

Your use of the word dear in your opening salutation makes me feel like you are in your eighties.
This is something you might want to avoid using in the future. Especially if you are looking to attract a member of the opposite sex. Men tend not to go for the geriatric set.

FYI, the correct spelling of the word young is, well, young. Not yung, though it was a nice try. Your use of punctuation is interesting to say the least. If you need help with knowing what letters to capitalize there are some books I could suggest and if you wouldn't mind telling me what your native language is I'll even try finding the books in that language. I'm a librarian. We are helpful that way.

I'm not exactly sure how you found my profile on any dating service as I've been married for 26 years and NOT actively looking for a date. Sure, I realize that it is not unheard of but I'm not Tiger Woods. I hear tell he might be available though.

By the way, I am not a sincere and caring man. Not that I couldn't be if I wanted to be but it seems that I am male gender challenged. To not put too fine a point on it, I'm a woman and I kind of like it that way.

Sending your picture is such a sweet thought but completely unnecessary as I will not be replying or be interested in dating you.

Sincerely,
Michele
(as opposed to Michael)




10 comments:

  1. I don't know, I mean, I think you should go out with her just to see. There might be something there. At least meet for coffee.

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  2. Bah ha ha haaa!

    What a laugh!

    Linda
    http://coloradoafarmlife.wordpress.com

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  3. As I was reading this I knew I wanted to tell you I hate it when people mistake our name for Michael. And then you wrote that same thing!
    Your post was too funny!

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  4. What? She didn't want to transfer 20 million US dollars into your bank account that her father, who was some bigwig in Nigeria until he died of some awful disease while being assassinated, left her and that she's trying to get out of the country??

    Cheapskate.

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  5. God, it's pathetic when even married women are getting more date offers than me!

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  6. OMGoodness...I can't even express to you how funny that is!!!!!! LOL!!!!!

    That'll have to do.

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  7. Do you think that anyone responds to those? I fear that they do! But why?

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  8. Yeah, I'm thinking Joy wants to be your mailorder bride.

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