Thursday, May 28, 2009

Our First Date

Every week Sprite's Keeper hosts the Spin Cycle and every week I blow it off and every week I say to myself; "Self, you have really got to think something up. You are so lame. Stop being so lazy." Yes, I do talk to myself. And yes, I am lame and lazy. So I guess would make me the three "L"s. Loquacious, lame, and lazy.

Anyway, this week's spin is dating which ties in very nicely with my stories from my misspent youth. Seriously folks, my youth was totally misspent. If it wasn't you would be bored by my ramblings by now. Unknowingly, I was thinking of you. I'm kind of like that. HA!

After about of year of dancing around the whole dating thing. Going through the leaving/divorce process and pretty much giving the whole marriage/dating thing the ole heave ho; JR decides to take me on a date. Before this time it was all group things.

I'd have liked to keep it this way but I felt really bad. Maybe, it was the way that my mom wielded guilt like a sword. JR never did but I felt the pressure. Bowing to that pressure I decided to go out with JR on a date. A real date. Dinner, movie, drinks afterward. No sex. We didn't do that on the first, third or even 12th date. It was the three months rule. For those of you that don't know about the 3 months rule I'll explain later. Just to let you in on the early 1980s secret; sex before 3 months made you a slut. Just an FYI.

We decided to do the movie before the dinner part of the evening. I can't really remember what we saw. JR would know. He remembers that sort of shit. Can't remember where he put his keys but where we went for our first day; yeah, he remembers that.

After the movie we went to a diner. One step down from fancy and 2 steps up from dive. This was a place with booths, silverware wrapped in paper napkins, and straws with paper wrappers. Can't remember what we had. Yet, again JR would remember but this is the same guy that can't find his way out of a brown paper bag.

We were sitting in our assigned booth. Our paper-wrapped silverware sitting on the table. The waitress brings our drinks. This is where the date makes a turn. For the better or the worse I'll let you decided.

Sitting at the booth chatting amicably about nothing in particular. The waitress brings our drinks. With the drinks she gently sets the straws next to each glass. The message was clear: "You use the straws". I'm willing. JR is more than willing. He loves places that require no dress code. The possibility of wearing a tie is scary for him.

JR unwraps his straw from the paper and dips it into his soda. Me, well not so much. I slowly unwrap the first inch of the straw paper. I put the straw gently to my lips and blow as hard as I can. Straight at JR.

Did I hit him? You bet! Smack in the eye.

I laughed my head off.

JR? Not so much.

I thought it was the funniest thing I had ever seen. Him sitting there blinking ridiculously; trying to act like he thought this happened everyday. The idiot!

After awhile, he started to laugh. His straw was already in his glass so he couldn't retaliate.

Over the years this has become something we do. Every once in awhile one of us will shoot our straws at the other.

You bet!
Something we taught our children?
Oh yeah!

Lately we've noticed that the paper that straws are coming in are not as shootable (not a word? Screw Blogger spellcheck. I'm a librarian, I'll make up words when I want). The straw paper doesn't really launch itself at its intended target anymore. This is disappointing to JR and I. Shooting straw papers at each other is a trip down memory lane.

So that was JR and my first date. Romantic, no? Yeah, I thought so too.

Want to play Spin Cycle? Well, you are a bit too late for this week. Sorry, see the first paragraph about my lameness. Next week? You can get all over it. And don't be intiminated by Jen at Sprite's Keeper. She may act tough but I really think she's a pussy cat. Oh don't tell her I said so; she'll kick my butt. Really, I'm kind of afraid of her.



  1. Actually I think it is very romantic. Mostly cause you guys are still together all these years later.

  2. I think it's romantic that JR remembers details about the first date.

    But the straw thing was really funny. We don't get paper-wrapped straws here or I would teach that to my children.

  3. Damn economy and recession making those straw wrappers thinner and thinner until you can't get any velocity! I think it's sweet! And I am a pussy cat. I just have a temper. It's one of my claws, I mean flaws! You're linked!

  4. JR and my husband have the exact same sort of memory. Josh can remember ever date, hour, and detail of our dates. I can't remember the date we got married. I know it was December... the actual day escapes my memory all the time.

    I love that you two shoot straws at each other -- even now. It's important to be able to reconnect with just a simple gesture -- particularly one that makes you both smile.


  5. Hmmm - I do believe I'm a female version of your husband. Beloved is not one for details, and his short-term memory sucks like a bucket of ticks. Me? I can remember not only where we went for our first date, but what we both wore, what we both ate, what we talked about - including my faux pas when I said something completely snarky about salesmen, and he informed me that - oh yes - he was in sales. But that's okay; I totally made up for it when I declared I was neither Republican or Democrat, but an anarchist. I believe that may have been the minute he fell in love with me.

    But as soon as I find my way out of this paper bag, I'll be looking for my keys.

  6. I think you guys have fun! And that is what it is all about fun!

    And yes, start your bean cookbook. When you are done I'll buy one, but you have to sign it!


  7. Ha ha! You had to know it was gonna turn out either really good or really bad at that point! Totally something I would have done. You have got a fella with a good sense of humor!

    Are people really having sex on the first date now? I thought that was only on Sex and the City?

  8. His memory sounds like mine. I tried to explain to my husband. My memory is like my desk. Unimportant things go on post its. Important things go in folders. What sits in front of your face all day long? The post its! That's why I always remember to tell him the trivial krappe, but since the important stuff is "filed" I never remember to tell him that... Great Blog.

  9. What a way to start the courtship off!! And for continuing it years later.....Hope you continue to find the good straw papers!!

    Those straw papers can still shoot. My boys have proved it over and over. I rejoice when they are lousy papers......they pout.

    Now if they would only learn to shoot them at each other and not some person with a very low self estemm so mom doesnt get reamed out about her unruly children that are "picking on her". The stories that could be told but are better off forgotten from those papers off straws!!! LOL

  10. You are awesome! I would have proposed right there if you'd done that to me. And I know what you mean about the straws. I tried teaching the kids that at McD's but they don't work. You have to fold the end over which takes some of the fun away from it.

  11. Are you kidding?? That is sooo romantic! I think humor is sexy and romantic. And the fact that he remembers those details? Oh man! That's awesome!

  12. Nice romantic straw to the face story, it rivals my stalker tale.

    So I'm a hoebag for making out on the first date, eh? You ladies and your morals... ;)

    JR is sweet to remember the details, you found yourself a keeper.

  13. awwwwwwww, it's the little things

  14. Well *someone* has to be the keeper of all that important information!

    I totally would have qualified as a slut in the 80s. Good thing I was doing my thing during the 90s.

  15. "A real date. Dinner, movie, drinks afterward. No sex"

    This is EXACTLY what I spun about! What the heck happened to "real dates"?????????


    Good spin though.
    100 points for hitting him in the eye.

  16. Don't you realize that you could have put his eye out!? Oh the humanity. Cheers Michele!!

  17. I like to shoot straw wrappers at my hubby and kids, too. Ha!